Monday, May 28, 2012

About My Last Post

Ever since my last post, when I described what happened when my mother and sister caught me all dressed up in my mother's lingerie, I have been tormented by that memory.  It was never really gone, but it was so long ago, and so much has happened since then, that I really haven't dwelled on it.  But since writing about it on my blog, the painfulness - the humiliation I remembered feeling as my mother bent me over her lap - me wearing her panties, girdle, stockings, bra stuffed full and high heels, wearing red lipstick, as my older sister watched, I really wished I were dead - has been eating at me.  And making me hard.  God!  It was awful.  And yet, it was amazing.  And even though they put it in the past, for weeks I remember not being able to look in their eyes.  Because when I did, I could tell they were looking at me in a whole new way.  I'd never be just a little boy again.  I was the sissy boy who liked wearing women's underwear.  I can't remember when the moment came that things seemed normal again.  But whenever it was, it was probably about that time that I went back to sneaking into her panty drawer - only now I was so much more careful.  And I never got caught again.  By my mother.


3 comments:

  1. well atleast you were alot more carefull
    frank29278
    xxx

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  2. There is one other thing you learned that maybe your mom shouldn't have taught you... Not to trust her with anything intimate about you. How many secrets did you keep from her? How many do you still keep from her? It is parents that condition their sons not to be intimate. And you can always count on peer pressure to supplement that conditioning.

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    Replies
    1. I suppose it is true that I have kept secrets from my mother. But, I have kept lots of secrets from lots of people. Mostly, my entire nature has been kept secret from the world.

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